The Difference of a Day

Yesterday was brilliant

There was Tea & Friends & Cats & Reading & Bunnies & Conversation & Art 

I only had one big cry

I dealt with issues at work

And difficult patrons

With panache and a smile

I even had a moment 

During a hug

When a friend said sorry

Where I thought

"For what?"

Before it all came back

I forgot to be SORROW for a moment

It was delightful in that sense that I 

Was filled with LIGHT

But today

I woke up crying

And in migraine pain

Waking from nightmares 

Of dead cats

Of dead sister

Waking to feelings

Of hopelessness

Of helplessness

Waking to fears

Of what else

What comes next

Glad for the day off

I laid in bed courting sleep

Until after one pm

I am measuring the day 

In increments

In accomplishments

Things so small 

I'd normally 

Not notice

I got up

I fed the bunnies

I'm eating healthy

I emptied the top rack of the dishwasher

(Bending down hurts my head

The bottom rack can wait)

I have cried

So many times

I've lost count

I am glad

No one else is home

To witness

Today 

I hold onto yesterday

As proof of light